Where have all the knights gone…
I had one of my students at church ask me recently “Abbi Berry… where have all the knights in shining armor gone? Is chilvary really dead? Do all boys act gross or say perverted things?” Those questions started my wheels to turning and I began asking myself some added questions… “Where have all the fair maidens gone? Is lady-like behavior dead?” Hmmmm…
There was a day when boys learned how to behave in front of girls & how to treat girls before they became young men. There was also a day when girls acted like they wanted to be respected & treated like the young ladies they were.
I think society has definitely done each generation a disservice by dumbing down our kids… but I also think Dads & Moms have done their own children a disservice as well by not teaching them appropriate behavior when around the opposite gender. There are some things you should NOT talk about when in front of the opposite gender… but sadly I hear it all the time.
Forget about dressing modestly for a second… what’s the point in personal dress codes if your mouth isn’t modest?
I know, I know. “Lighten up, Mrs Abbi. Gah. We’re just joking around.” Okay. Fine. But I don’t want my daughter going out with some BOY who thinks it’s ok to make flippant remarks about the female body. I want her to date a young man who respects her for the treasure she is, who treats her as valuable, precious & sacred – because young men like that are the ones that will guard not just her heart but her mind.
So I said all of that to say this: Dudes that I have the privilege to know personally & those I don’t… consider every word that leaves your lips. Are they words that are worth listening to? Are they the words from a man of character, a man who is made body, soul, heart & mind in the image of a holy, magnificent God? If you are in a dating relationship, do you treat that young lady like the dwelling place of God that she is? Do you guard her heart & mind with every fiber of your being? That’s who God created you to be. A warrior – not a child. Step up & lead this generation of young men towards their God-ordained destiny.
Ladies… do you see yourself as valuable, treasured & precious. The majority of guys will treat you according to how you see yourself. Do you wanna attract punks? Speak loosely. Act inappropriate. Wear as little clothing as possible. Carry yourself in a provocative manner. They will swarm like flies to a piece of meat… and they will drain you, use you, then toss you out like yesterday’s leftovers. BUT if you want a knight in shining armor… be modest not just in dress but in action & word. Robe yourself in humility & compassion. Wear love for others as your perfume. Live in a way that says “My heart isn’t a plaything for careless little boys. My heart is the future crowning glory for a man after God’s own heart.”
Why is this heavy on my heart? Because guys… you are the example for the small boys that my daughter might date one day. They watch you. They listen to you. They want to be you. Be a hero… show them what a real man is. There are so few of them left in the world today.
Girls… my daughter is watching. One day in the near future, as hard as I try, I just won’t be totally relevant to Layla. She will adopt a mentor closer to her age. Maybe one of you will be that girl. She will watch you. Listen to you. Learn to be you. Show her that virtuous women don’t have to just be gray-haired Mommas or Mamaws. Show her what it means to patiently wait on God’s man.
Why? Because I want my daughter to be able to say that she allowed God to write her love story, thanks to the epic example of a few good men & women.
Peace.
Abbi Berry
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